Self Care September - Day 14

Did you catch the Emotions virus?

Most people can pick up on the moods of others by the emotional signals they give off - facial expressions, body language etc.  But how aware are we of our own emotional signals and whether they belong to us or others?

Did you ever have the scenario were a friend called by and you became their shoulder to cry on......by the time they left; feeling better because they had released the weight from their shoulders; you were feeling exhausted and perhaps emotionally battered?  Or after spending time with someone who is very negative in their thinking, and every response they give is negative and fearful; you find your own mood quite low and find it hard to see the good in life.  The opposite is also true, being in the company of someone who is cheerful and relaxed about life, can lift your spirits and have you wondering what all the fuss is about, of course everything is going to be okay! 

We all know and psychology research has shown us that our moods are affected by the moods of others, especially those we spend the most time with.  Our inner psychological programming is based on those we spent most of our time with in our formative years.  Did you ever find yourself saying something that sounded just like your mother?  Psychologists call it Emotional Contagion....which makes it sound like a bug or a virus we can pick up.  And we literally do simply pick it up. 

Does this mean we are powerless about it....absolutely not!  Our entire make up is designed from thousands of years of evolution and learning to acclimate to our environment has its advantages when responding to danger or threat. However, in modern times, our threats have become more psychological than physical and with modern living full and caotic our instinctive programming is not always required to the same degree.  The key to understanding our moods and how they are affected by others is to stay aware.  When we become aware of how certain people, enviroments or situations affect our moods, we can put steps or measures in place to help to "protect" ourselves against picking up the mood bug. 

If you can remove yourself from the company of those affecting your mood in a negative manner than do so; however; this is not always possible.  It could be a family member, a work colleage or a friend having a really bad day.  The first thing to remember is that once you become aware of how another person's mood is affecting you, to realise, you do not have to take on their emotions.  This doesn't mean that you are not empathic or caring towards another, it is simply to recognise that you can feel empathy and care towards another, without needing to feel the same emotions.

When learning Reiki for the first time, my Reiki Master taught me a very simple yet effective technique.  Our minds cannot tell the difference between what is real and what we imagine to be real.  If you can visualise something clearly and presisely, your mind takes it as reality, and your body and natural responses will treat to it as such.  Practicing the below technique as often as possible, means that when you need it, you can recall it easily and your mind will accept it when you need it most.

The technique is called shielding or cloaking:

• Close your eyes and become aware of your physical self, your body.

• Now bring your awareness outside your physical self, your body, to the area around your body - known as the Aura.

• Begin to visualise the aura of your physical body.  What colour is it?

• Now visualise your aura turning a beautiful shining silver, like silver armour.

• See it clearly from above your head, surrounding your body, and below your feet, into the ground above you.

• Now visualise the emotions of the environment around you trying to breach your silver armour.

• Know and visualise nothing can penetrate your shield.

• When you clearly visualise the shield, you feel completely safe and protected in your own space, in your own energy.  You carry this shield around with you all day, and at any time you feel affected by the emotions of others; recall the visual to your mind.  Knowing that nothing can breach your armour.

Allow yourself to take the time to practise the above visualisation.  It can really help you to feel secure in all manner of situaions where you may feel affected by your environment.  Remember, this doesn't negate your responsibility to remove yourself from negative environments; rather it is a psychological tool to help you to feel emotionally protected from the emotions of others.

Give it a try and let me know what you felt!

Warmest wishes,

Emily xxx